A Medieval bugbear

                                                      Do not attempt this at home

As this years Dias Medievais draws to a close it has not been without its bugbears, and I dont just mean those fearsome imaginary creatures evoked to frighten naughty children. The streets of Castro Marim were alive with plenty of those hobgoblins, and even stalls selling all the accoutrements for evil parents to dress up as Vlad The Impaler and attempt the fantasy at home.No, what I am talking about is the other type of bugbear that is a source of annoyance and soon grows into a bone of contention, baby buggies.The last few days the streets have  been tailbacked with this tiresome form of infant transportation.Who in their right mind tries to navigate one of these around congested narrow streets.
Some of the designer models in medieval blue or festival fuschia you could expect to pay top dollar for and yet their owners are grumbling about the entry fee to the festival and having parked their car on the pavement to avoid paying the paltry parking fee of €1.50. Then, as we witnessed, making a dash through the gate with their pushchair when the stewards back is turned.It maybe a sweet ride for baby but for the pedestrian it becomes a hazard.Some of them are being pushed empty perhaps with a couple of bottles of water inside but no sight of the wretched ankle biter it is supposed to be carrying.Some of these stylish strollers even Cynthia Nixon would roll around the streets of Manhattan in Sex in the City.I thought I had left all this behind In Stoke Newington ten years ago, but it has returned to haunt me and cause my exposed ankles to be covered in bruises. Having got that off my chest, we have this year seen hirsute topless Scottish lads double somersaulting and cartwheeling their way down the streets in their kilts.When Birnam Wood comes to Dunsinane, far too much excitement,woops what´s that bush I saw yonder or was it a sporren. It all happened in just a flash.After three days these youths had found themselves some medieval totty and calmed down considerably.Thank god for the lull in testosterone. 
A new bar,Taberna Medieval had this year come into its own.As you walked into this watering hole you expected to be greeted by Falstaff. images of the Merry Wives of Windsor came to mind. Wenches rushing around sweeping plates of half finished morcela, pork scratchings and other discarded detritus into oversized baskets.But it was the music that provided the background to all this that produced a successful modern take on medieval.First we had the wonderful warbling notes of Jethro Tull´s flautist Ian Anderson "Serenading the cuckoo" from their debut album This Was.
I was transported back to 1968.This was time travelling at its best, sitting on the raised terrace of a medieval tavern in 2016 listening to some of my favourite music from the sixties. But what came next was a triumph of re-invention.
The Belarussian band Stary Olsa, whose video of their medieval version of Metallica’s song One was a viral hit came loud and clear over the system with their medieval rendering of the song Californication, originally by the Red Hot Chili Peppers.
From then on it just got better and better.Pink Floyds "Another brick in the wall" and Deep Purple´s "Child in time".We didn´t need no education,oh no. What a great evening it turned out to be and buggy bear free.Such fun.Until next year, I leave you with this....



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